Archive for December, 2011

December 21, 2011

What Exactly is it that Makes My Relationship so Great?

As you may have noticed, I have incorporated pages in my blog now, and one of those pages is titled “love life.” I’m sure you can guess what it was about.
While I was writing about how great my relationship is with Bass Guy, I decided to write a post about what makes relationships work. So here it is:

1. Communication. This is seriously the most important component of a relationship. You cannot have a relationship without communication. Yes, I know, what an obvious statement, but for some reason no one seems to get it. Except of course those who have long standing relationships. Let me put it this way, how is your significant other supposed to give you everything you want if he doesn’t know what you want? I have a friend who recently had her heart torn to bits. I remember a couple late night chats that involved conversations like these:

“Should I be worried he never texts me during the day?”
“Well, do you text him?”
“No, the guy should always text first.”
“Well maybe he thinks you don’t like to text. Have you told him you would like to text him during the day?”
“No, he should already know.”

Now before I make someone out there upset, her boyfriend was out of line and majorly at fault. It was not only her fault for the breakup.
It may seem obvious what went wrong, but so many people do it! My friend is in a crowd of many brainwashed girls who think that the perfect guy will just “know.” My friend is not to be blamed, but instead Cosmopolitan and chick flicks and Disney are to blame. However, that is another discussion altogether.

2. Touching. This is probably very bizarre hearing from me because my closest friends know I am not touchy-feely. However, physical contact between partners is of the utmost importance. If you don’t hold their hand or show affection how can they understand that you are attracted to them? This sounds like a stretch but if you are afraid to touch them outside of the bedroom, what do you expect to happen inside the bedroom? Now, I am not capable of giving sex advise because I know nothing of the topic, but I can easily see how physical contact will enhance my intimacy in the future.
Just hold their hand or waist, or simply rest your hand on their back, whatever. Get close, get personal.

3. Make it Work. Tim Gunn’s words have never run so true. If I have learned anything valuable about relationships from Bass Guy, it is that relationships are work. You must put in an enormous amount of energy to sustain a functioning relationship. People who have been married for 30+ years (like Bass Guy’s parents) are not necessarily better matches for each other. No long time married couple doesn’t argue, it’s just that they don’t quit when the going gets tough. Same goes for long distance relationships. I you love and trust your partner then you can wait for them.

Bass Guy and I exceed at each of these simple concepts and that is why our relationship is so strong. I hope this helps anyone who may be looking for advice.

EmilyTreat

Tags:
December 21, 2011

Speaking of Strange Encounters

I am going through a massive update of my blog and I started tagging strange events I had experienced as “strange encounter.” I have publish two articles involving strange people I have met up north, one of which was flirting with me.

These stories have sparked some memories of a very, very strange encounter.

About a year ago, I began chatting on FB with a boy from my hometown who was enrolled at my college. He seemed pretty cool and I am open to gaining some friends. He began flirting with me a few weeks later and I ignored the cyber advances.

After a few weeks of flirting, he decided to ask me out on a hike. This was clearly before Bass Guy and I were serious, but I was still not fast enough on my feet to think of a way out. So I said I was too busy with school work and we should reschedule.

It was at that moment when he sent this message:

Rhetorically speaking, how would you feel if you had anal sex with me in the forest?”

Uh, what? I didn’t realize I gave off an anal in the woods kind of vibe.

Either way, I told him I would never do such a thing with someone I hardly knew and our conversations ended. Forever.

EmilyTreat